A Talking Cat!?! - The Movie - The Blog

Hi! Oh. It’s been a while. Hey. I have a new theory on the creation of A Talking Cat!?!

We all know Eric Roberts’ voice work could be easily recreated by a Teddy Ruxpin running low on batteries. In interviews with David DeCoteau, it has been stated that the talking cat’s voice was recorded in 15 minutes. No surprise.

The article also states that David asked Eric if he wanted to do the voice work. And Eric agreed on the spot and rolled off the recording right then and there. But here is what I think happened.

I think Eric Roberts called up David’s voicemail of his own free will and left a rambling trail of nonsense and cat noises. David then said “I can build a movie around this” and had a script written around Eric’s voicemail.

Look. Okay. I don’t actually think that’s what happened. But it doesn’t sound implausible, does it?

Welcome back, me! It has been a while. Like, years a while. Why start this dumb blog if you’re not going to finish the job of documenting the entire breadth of A Talking Cat!?! Let’s press on, shall we? It’s nice to see you too.

When last we left Susan, she was packing away some cooling cheese. She made sure to do this very carefully, as there is a lot of time to fill. To make it seem exciting, the background music escalated like she was racing a clock. A clock that was also filling time. That’s not how clocks work.

Cut to, a river. Cut to, sloppy Phil crossing a wooden bridge the width of one car. Last we saw Phil, he was coming to murder Susan. I mean, he was going to take a walk in the woods. The woods where he will hide Susan’s remains. After he murders her.

As Susan carefully carries her chafing dish full of “top notch” cheese puffs to the car, she is witness to some foreshadowing. A car’s tires SCREECH (on a wooden bridge) as a…the hell kind of car is that?

Is that a swan? Is the car embarrassed to be in this movie so it’s sporting a fake logo? It’s possible I’m ignorant (very possible) as I’m not a car guy, but that doesn’t look legit to me. At the very least, it’s some aftermarket…front facing speakers? I don’t know.

Anyway, this guy almost runs over Phil like he’s going to run over Duffy. OH NO! You didn’t guess that’s what was going to happen later? I’m sorry to spoil the surprise. Duffy gets hit by this car. Later.

So car tires squeal on a wooden bridge, Phil almost dies, then he trots on over to Susan and makes small talk about her being a chef. Not a chef, a caterer. Don’t worry. Susan corrects Phil. Because caterers…aren’t chefs? Sorry for all the elipses. Maybe Susan didn’t go to culinary school, but she still cooks. Well, her children cook. Okay, I convinced me. She isn’t a chef.

The printing on Susan’s tag may be crooked. She probably saved money on the printing and then wasted that saved money on her money-losing cheese puffs.

That’s enough small talk. It’s a “big day for my company today,” Susan explains. But, hold on, let’s get some more small talk going. Do you want some water? Susan invites her serial killer in for another glass of water. This is his “my plan is working” face.

Well, that was fun wasn’t it? Another scene, gone by.

Wait, is that an exterior shot of not Susan’s house? I’ll save it for next time. But, I haven’t noticed that before? Next time! But! NEXT TIME!